Being honest, it is early, super early. I woke up and felt pure super duper.
The super duper makes sense. I listened to what I needed to listen to, made the necessary changes, at least understood the necessary changes required, and, most importantly, am already doing what is necessary to remove the stress from my life. Integration, it is all it is, listening and applying.
We bring in a whole bunch of stuff here, whatever this topic ends up being, all of the stuff we have learnt, particularly around removing discrimination, and the application of it to our lives beyond just the medicine world. We’ll bring in all the other words we are learning too, like integration, saturated fats, eccentric contractions, free conversation, safe spaces, happy faces. Basically, a random conversation about random stuff that won’t be random in the end, will all make sense.
As we move onwards in part two, and the closer we get to part three of the Groundskeeper drugs in the space will become less and less, the intention to have only the bare minimum to present in part three. Part three my focus will not be on medicine, not at all!
I keep saying we do not need drugs, we do not, they simply speed up the healing process. It’s done for me, this part, reached the endpoint of medicine, know yourself, accept yourself. Now, I integrate my world as a world without them, take you on that journey a little with me, teach all the same stuff in a different way.
Knowing that you do not know
Topic floating around in my head, where does it go, where does it go, where does it go? Here or in the Way, here is better I reckon, maybe, we will see.
Look, honestly, not trying to rock my own socks or anything, telling the truth nothing else, am bloody good in the sack. The evidence is beyond doubt clear. Have almost no complaints from anyone in this regard, fucking good! Get it! Pun intended.
Talking about socks, actually started wearing the exercise ones for exercise, comfortable on the feet too!
The reason, really super simple reason I am good at this thing is because I know beyond any doubt of doubt that I have absolutely zero idea what I am doing. Literally no idea, none at all. More importantly am more than content to admit it, clearly.
All I do is listen to you, nothing else. Start fumbling and bungling about, give shit a go and see what happens. In the process I pay complete attention to the environment we have created together.
Hear your noises, smell your smells, pay attention to the changes in your body, the goo flowing from your gash, the relaxing of your rectum, all that good stuff.
Hearing, listening, is all I need, you need, we all need to be good at this thing.
There have been a few times I went in and thought, yeah, I am going to slam you into next week, I didn’t. I was shit. Cindie top of that list.
Probably one of the, if not the root I most looked forward to in my life. Phenomenal body, a little bit older, was near impossible to stop my penis doing penis things when she wore some of the outfits she did to work. Beach volleyballer, do I really need to say more?
Went on a couple of dates, had her back to my place and smashed her brains out.
No, I did not, full excitement and entered her like a rat on a hot tin roof, just wham! It is not the way to good sex. Not at all. In fact the way I entered her would have been painful, nothing like the hot romantic steamy was hoping for. The sex was alright but I fucked it completely, and she didn’t want a fucking thing to do with me after.
Apologised to her a while after, she accepted, was really happy I reflected, took responsibility and voiced it. Thank you Fred, thank you for looking at yourself, is very uncommon in your type. My type, men.
Listening is imperative to good sex, not going into thinking this and that, simply letting it be what it is. I learn, we learn eachother, and together make the thing as awesome as it has always been.
Clearly too, I learn from every experience, never ever entered a woman like that again until she, and I, were both ready for it, when it was not an intention at all.
It can be done this way, absolutely, but one has to know their partner, know them very very well. Know when the body is ready for the activity to be completely animal, then and only then is it great.
But, even with Sarah who I entered at least three times a week (in our least active periods, period itself never stopped us!) for over seven years, we only went at it like this a small percentage of the time. It’s not the general way to great sex.
Listening starts with knowing you don’t know, learning together to know, all it takes.
Look out
¡Cuidado señoras, Frederick puede tener conversaciones en español!
Cuidado, come on, why not use the same word for look out as you do for lookout! Have taken away one of my favourite things to do with the ladies, ask Sarah, she fuckin’ loved it! Haha, not quite, laughed each time however, can’t have despised it that much. Everytime when driving along the road and a lookout sign comes into view, LOOK OUT, pointing at the same time! Well, if the sign says lookout, we all better look out, could be important. Mirador and cuidado, ruined it for me!
Conversations in Spanish, well, depending on the topic. Had a coffee with a mate today, and his son, other two popped in and out of the kitchen as well. Actually, I fucked up, told him I’d come around Thursday afternoon but completely forgot about it. Afternoons are not for concentration shit, and having a conversation in Spanish is a lot of concentration. Far from peing an activity of attention as yet.
However, it really depends on what we want to talk about.
Saul (sar-ool), runs La Casa Amarilla City, and, man, he is a beautiful man. Nothing but happiness comes from his being. He can be serious too, just like me, and just like me when he is serious and his mouth starts to move the smile comes back. It lives there and here, it’s what life is all about. We can feel heartbreak through a smile when it is understood. Understood that it doesn’t need to destroy my heart every time.
* Note, I stayed one night at Saul’s place, is not the long-term stop. Long-term place am not going to give the name, they are doing alright! Two people, well all of them are beautiful, a special thank you to Carlos and Daniella, always the happiest genuine beautiful smiles, friendly as fuck. Thanks for the beautiful month!
We chatted a while about Banos, Saul choosing here over Quito for obvious reasons, tranquilidad (self-explanatory). A little bit about family, including me needing to explain the distance between me and Isaac; kilometres and time. I found out, as Saul did, that these circumstances are not unique to my world, nor are they to his.
We also learnt that both of our goverments and societies make it hard for men’s rights to have any say in the matter of their families. Yeah, heartbreaking.
From there talked a little about government, that we have a likeness on the priority being heavily weighted with the rich, the rest of the priority the little bit rich. Learned there is nothing left for the rest of us, in both places.
Australia is significantly better off in many areas, in fact, we do some things stupidly beautiful. For examples, our Medicare and health care system, the prison system (comparatively to other places), social welfare payments, that, if you are willing to work within the system one will never be void of a meal and place to sleep. Ecuador, haha, no none of this.
Australia’s HECS system, university loans, which are interest free and do not need to be paid back until such time as the person who required the learning is earning enough money. Everybody in Australia has access to a university education. Everybody. Even you naysayer!
The USA, yeah, they have loans. A little different, just slightly, interest accrues on these things. And, well, it doesn’t matter if you are earning money or not, gotta find a way to pay it back.
Your results at school were shit? So what, take a few years break, resubmit your application as a mature age student and a significant portion of the courses are available to you. Do not even need to do bridging courses, preparation courses, for some you will have to.
Or, go to TAFE, also get supported in the same way for this, and you get to see if study is for you in the mean time. I received credit equaling 1.5/2 years at university for a 2.5 year TAFE course, ridiculously good.
Trades? Well, our government makes sure you can feed and roof yourself during training. It’s a big reason why you get money in your bank every fortnight, $650 in your first year, more? Almost nothing for Australia, but not nothing at all, you will not starve. Afterwards, though, your pretty alright yeah? Do you know how much people doing trades in Ecuador get? Yes, you do bud! Zero, except the fuck all their employee can pay them.
Then we moved onto our indigenous folk. Absolute heartbreak in both directions.
Plants next, of course, Saul has a soft spot for hongos, and as you know, so do I. Talked plant medicine, mushrooms specifically and how beautiful they are for 10 minutes. Moved on to plants, the natural world, animals, this phenomenal thing we walk on.
Yeah, we can have a conversation now ladies, on a few things. Didn’t have to concentrate too hard either. Saul corrected my Spanish when required, was great, just ask you to do the same please.
Oh, and Woman, Australia, she is where we will have our kids. Yep, non-negotiable buds unless your country provides the same circumstances or better. Australia, the absolute greatest or greatest worlds to create opportunity. Hence, I fight and will always fight to make her better.
Quality shit
Another non-negotiable ladies, getting good shit. For example, you will not talk me into buying that chainsaw because it is $150, I will buy the $750 one no matter how much you try to influence me.
Starting with kitchen knives, the ones here are terrible., If I wasn’t a decent cook who knew how to work with knives cooking would not be enjoyable. Also, good quality stuff, especially knives improve the safety of the activity. A shitty chainsaw is just asking for trouble as crappy knives end up in all sorts of injury.
A good quality knife with sharp blade will leave a clean cut if one messes up, a crappy quality will not, can tear and pull the skin and leave a real mess. It extends the cooking time and makes it hard to cut things well.
Tools, simple stuff, hammers, axes, hoes, gardening stuff. These items breaking down all the time, having to put the heads back on the handle continuously is pure shit. Accidentally missing the target and smashing the tool into the concrete, talking hammer here, should not break it. In fact, the only thing that should be left with damage is what is hit.
Fred almost got me with a hammer one day, yeah, top bloke. Was fixing the pushbike and left the tools I needed next to it, bike still there, still being worked on. Fred asks me to help him in the shed, I go with him. We enter, he sees the bike, the tools next to it neatly and goes fucking troppo. Screaming and banging on about not putting shit away.
Fred, I am still working on the bike, it is right there, the tools next to it. Plan is to put the tools away when am finished.
Massive round house swing, the hammer is in the clenched fist, it smashes into the concrete merely a few centimetres from my foot. Massive dent left in the concrete, my heartrate going at 300 miles an hour, no damage to the hammer, good quality hammer! Fred’s face just said what the fuck did I almost just do to my boy. Never happened again, never forgot about it, awful.
He punched Danyel in the face when he was 17 too after finding out Danyel was smoking, Fred himself being a heavy heavy smoker. Opened up Danyel’s nose and everything. Good bloke my dad was.
Anyway, we have good quality stuff, just like the camping gear, and all the daily, weekly and sometimes tasks become so much more enjoyable for everyone. Plus, the stuff just lasts, no waste, less waste, this is really important to me.
Waste, let’s try to minimise it starting with wasting the resource which is nothing first, money.
$3.75
Hey Aussies, what could you buy for lunch with $3.75? Anything like the below?
Ha, nope, one of the last things I bought form home was at a bakery, about the cheapest place to buy lunch out in Australia. A party pie and party sausage roll, cost the same as this meal, get about three mouthfuls instead of a properly satiated stomach. What a ridiculously greedy selfish pathetically ignorant country.
The food above too, organic, no shit. Almost no point cooking at home except that my dinner costs me half this to make and is only that expensive because I couldn’t find the big garden in the community where have full permission to shop, pick shit, for free. This place is phenomenally beautiful. It is home, it is the only home for me.
So, ladies, we want to make a life it is here. You do not want to be here well I do not want to be with you, don’t waste my life with your rubbish please. My family, the people who love me, ever want to see me again you know where to find me. I stand out, probably the tallest bloke in town, plus walk everywhere, even up the big fuck off hill. You’ll be pointed in the right direction if you ask, ¿de donde es Fred, Australiano alto?
Things that are too beautiful here, for one popcorn is not called popcorn, it is called las palomitas, which literally translates to little pidgeons. Funny funny, when looking at the popcorn makes sense.
Other things, there is not a medicine environment, not psychedelic anyway, this ignorant new church barely exists here. We, or I, will bring it in the right way after gaining the trust of the community, we will then ostracize anyone who comes and does it poorly (which, as you know, is you and everybody right now). My hosts have plant medicine in the two gardens, shitloads, but they are not medicine at all, we would put them under the naturopathy banner.
Naturopathy banner, difference here, people know how to use this stuff unlike you Naturopath, you are full of shit. Guarantee it.
Everybody knows you are full of shit because everyone that has seen one of you talks about needing this and that junk, and some other random rubbish, that you were the one who prescribed it. Yet, you did not tell them to go for a walk, stop eating shit and being a lazy fat cunt. Seriously, morons, somewhat as fat as buggery comes to you this is the prescription, do exercise, eat less shit and then think about tinkering. Ignorance, the Australian way.
But, I want them to come back Fred, can’t say stuff like that to them. Did I not already mention the Australian way? Ridiculously greedy selfish pathetic ignorant country? You don’t tell the truth in order to fill your pockets, you are the example I am talking about, piece of shit.
Well, that’s that, it was fun, back to the Spanish study.